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Correction/lettre de motivation
Cours gratuits > Forum > Thèmes généraux, jeux, chansons || En basCorrection/lettre de motivation
Message de miou21 posté le 28-11-2013 à 05:21:41 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je cherche quelqu'un de préférence un anglophone ou un bilingue, pour corriger ma lettre de motivation en anglais s'il vous plaît.
C'est pour un programme Erasmus.
Merci beaucoup
Dear Sir, Dear Madam
My education within a Bachelor’s degree in Foreign Languages English and Spanish Applied to Law and Management, proposes to do a Master’s degree in a foreign university thanks to the ERASMUS program /as a foreign exchange student. Discovering another country, a different culture, practicing another language and experimenting new work methods are a great opportunities for me.
I am an Undergraduate student in my third-year in a Bachelor’s degree in Foreign Languages English and Spanish Applied to Law and Management, and I am very interested in following my Master’s degree courses in your University.
Hard-working, outgoing, enthusiastic and eager to learn more, I am motivated to go to another country to enrich and to enjoy an international experience.
Indeed, learning English is my passion and the excellent courses you provide meet my biggest interests and should offer me the opportunity to speak English as a. I want to be bilingual, to follow my studies in International Trade field. Unfortunately I don't have many occasions to practice English in France. That is the main reason why I really want to spend a year in England/USA, especially in your prestigious University.
I have already been in different countries, so I have developed a capacity of adaptation and self-government. However, these stays didn't enable me to practice English as much as I could have wished.
As a French student, to have an international career, especially in English speaking countries, a prestigious University as yours is a wonderful occasion to practice and learn English.
I have this project for several years and I heard many enthusiastic students relating to this year as a great experience.
Please find enclosed my resume and all the required documents.
Plus marque de politesse
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 28-11-2013 08:28
Message de miou21 posté le 28-11-2013 à 05:21:41 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je cherche quelqu'un de préférence un anglophone ou un bilingue, pour corriger ma lettre de motivation en anglais s'il vous plaît.
C'est pour un programme Erasmus.
Merci beaucoup
Dear Sir, Dear Madam
My education within a Bachelor’s degree in Foreign Languages English and Spanish Applied to Law and Management, proposes to do a Master’s degree in a foreign university thanks to the ERASMUS program /as a foreign exchange student. Discovering another country, a different culture, practicing another language and experimenting new work methods are a great opportunities for me.
I am an Undergraduate student in my third-year in a Bachelor’s degree in Foreign Languages English and Spanish Applied to Law and Management, and I am very interested in following my Master’s degree courses in your University.
Hard-working, outgoing, enthusiastic and eager to learn more, I am motivated to go to another country to enrich and to enjoy an international experience.
Indeed, learning English is my passion and the excellent courses you provide meet my biggest interests and should offer me the opportunity to speak English as a. I want to be bilingual, to follow my studies in International Trade field. Unfortunately I don't have many occasions to practice English in France. That is the main reason why I really want to spend a year in England/USA, especially in your prestigious University.
I have already been in different countries, so I have developed a capacity of adaptation and self-government. However, these stays didn't enable me to practice English as much as I could have wished.
As a French student, to have an international career, especially in English speaking countries, a prestigious University as yours is a wonderful occasion to practice and learn English.
I have this project for several years and I heard many enthusiastic students relating to this year as a great experience.
Please find enclosed my resume and all the required documents.
Plus marque de politesse
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 28-11-2013 08:28
Réponse: Correction/lettre de motivation de miou21, postée le 28-11-2013 à 22:23:45 (S | E)
Il n y a vraiment personne qui puisse m'aider?
Réponse: Correction/lettre de motivation de gerondif, postée le 29-11-2013 à 00:21:14 (S | E)
Bonsoir,
quelques grosses erreurs parfois.
"a" + pluriel: a great opportunities.
la place de l'adjectif épithète est devant le nom , pas derrière:Foreign Languages English and Spanish Applied to Law and Management
erreurs en bleu.
Dear Sir, Dear Madam
My education within a Bachelor’s degree in Foreign Languages English and Spanish Applied to Law and Management, proposes to do a Master’s degree in a foreign university thanks to the ERASMUS program (la phrase n'a pas de sens:"mon éducation à l'intérieur d'une licence en langues étrangères anglais et espagnol appliquées au droit et au management propose de faire une maîtrise dans une université étrangère grâce au programme Erasmus.)/as a foreign exchange student. Discovering another country, a different culture, practicing another language and experimenting new work methods are a great opportunities for me.
I am an Undergraduate student in my third-year in a Bachelor’s degree in Foreign Languages English and Spanish Applied to Law and Management, and I am very interested in following my Master’s degree courses in your University.(fait double emploi avec votre première phrase qui disait la même chose. Comme celle-ci est correcte, autant la garder)
Hard-working, outgoing, enthusiastic and eager to learn more, I am motivated to go to another country to enrich(ne convient pas, surtout sans complément) and to enjoy an international experience.
Indeed, learning English is my passion and the excellent courses you provide meet my biggest interests and should offer me the opportunity to speak English as a ....(incomplet). I want to be bilingual, to follow (ne convient pas, on poursuit des études, on ne les suit pas)my studies in International Trade field. Unfortunately I don't have many occasions (opportunities) to practice (le nom est en c, le verbe practise s'ecrit avec un s an anglais et un c en américain) English in France. That is the main reason why I really want to spend a year in England/USA, especially in your prestigious University.
I have already been in(to) different countries, so I have developed a capacity of adaptation and self-government. However, these stays didn't enable me to (maladroit comme verbe, je trouve)practice English as much as I could have wished.
As a French student, to have an international career, especially in English speaking countries, (phrase bancale, aller dans une université est une occasion de...) a prestigious University as(comme en comparaison n'est pas as qui signifie en tant que) yours is a wonderful occasion to practice and learn English.
I have(mauvais temps avec un depuis) this project for several years and I heard many enthusiastic students relating to this year as a great experience.
Please find enclosed my resume and all the required documents.
Réponse: Correction/lettre de motivation de miou21, postée le 29-11-2013 à 00:28:26 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour cette correction, cela va énormément m'aider ^^
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